The next morning, in the softness of waking thought, he imagined Val lying on the bedsheets next to him. Adrien moved his head where he wished for Val's arms to embrace him. In his fantasy, this was a morning like any other, a moment of usual affection, only one thread of many, each part of a life spent at each other's side. Imagining to be holding Val's hand, Adrien held his right hand in his left hand and run his thumb over his fingers.

"Val", Adrien whispered to his pillow, "you are... the most wonderful person I've ever met. You deserve to be happy... I hope you will be, no matter where I go".

He took in a shuddering breath. He felt as if something was tugging at his insides, trying to drag them downwards and into the abyss.